“Reality has no security, and that is its beauty. Life has no security, and that is its beauty. Because there is no security, there is an adventure. Because the future is unknown, nobody knows what is going to happen the next moment. That’s why there is challenge, growth, and adventure. If you miss the adventure, you miss all. If your life is not an adventure, of a search into the unknown, then you are living in vain”. – By Osho.
We all have Insecurity in our relationships, jobs, body image, social anxiety, etc. Everybody deals with Insecurity from time to time. It can affect us in numerous areas of our lives. Recent events in our lives can significantly affect our mood and how we feel about ourselves. And it produces anxiety about our goals and ability to handle certain situations in life. These feelings of Insecurity are called against yourself or self-destructive.
Let’s talk about Insecurity in a relationship. Whether you are single, dating, or in a relationship, there are many ways your self-destructive voice can sneak into your romantic lives. Have you ever asked yourself how I know if my relationship is healthy? How can I overcome my Insecurity? Is it time for me to leave my relationship? These are common questions that many people ask themselves when they feel insecure in their relationship. Many things can cause relationship insecurity, but it often results from feeling uncontrolled, neglected, or not good enough. When it comes to relationships, people can call you crazy and needy all they want. We feel insecure because we bring our past to the new relationship. My only advice and my own experiences say is to value yourself. You have worth. There’s a reason your partner chose to be with you, even if you don’t see it. You have failings if you’re imperfect. So what? So does everyone. There are people in the world who are more intelligent than you, better-looking than you, richer than you. So what? Nobody is exactly like you. Nobody offers what you offer because no one else can always make you feel loved. The only one that can make you feel loved all the time is yourselves. Love yourself first, then love others. You may not realize it as the emotions takeover your mind and body, but unconsciously, you only have one job at that moment—to stop history from repeating itself by keeping the person close. And so, you do and say everything you can to try and control the situation: constant crying, overthinking, questioning, phone checking, texting, over-pleasing, and so on. Brianna Wiest said People would come and go as they scheduled. Let them. Holding on does not affect them; it affects only you.
In my opinion, from my experiences, Insecurity means Fear. Fear is something hard to destroy. Relationships force people to become vulnerable toward each other, and we don’t want to invest when we are afraid our efforts won’t be rewarded with happiness. Everybody struggles with relationships. Yes, even those happy couples strolling together through the park are set by doubts and fears because life itself can throw us a curveball. That’s why it’s so hard to grow out of these fears. We have to leave our securities and trust that we will survive whatever comes our way. I was insecure about love because I had been seeking love since childhood. Insecurity in love doesn’t mean only in a relationship; it is parents’ love, siblings’ love, etc. It’s all about emotional feelings. Those emotions can heal us if we miss or don’t get it. Its significant impact on our today’s life. And I have gone through that. Two things happen: when we get love from our family, spouse, and so on, we become codependent on them, and the second thing is when we don’t have love from our family or loved one, we start losing confidence in ourselves. Fortunately, love comes into our life, and then we want security. This is Insecurity about relationships, and there is what we think.
Let’s What Osho talks about Insecurity. The season will change, the climate will change, the fall will come, and the spring will come. Everything will go on changing; nothing can be taken for granted. This is Insecurity. If we don’t understand Insecurity, we can never understand life. We want everything to be certain, permanent. But have we ever thought about what will be the outcome of it if everything is permanent? We eat the same food, say the same things every day, and listen to the same things every day. And there is no death to defeat this tragic living- we are living in a nightmare. Life can be secured when we are dead, and everything can be certain. Insecurity keeps us fresh, alive, and adventurous- knowing that things can be changed. Even without their changing them, they are going to be changed. So, there is significant scope for change, for transformation. But the training of our minds is such that we are made afraid of Insecurity, and our whole life, we are trying for safety. We want to be secure financially, ethically, religiously, and in every dimension. But security means Death, a living death. It means tomorrow will be simply a repetition of today, and today is the repetition of yesterday.
After understanding and exploring the Insecurity of life, my perspective changed. My path of personal growth is mainly about challenging my insecurities. Do you know about nature versus nurture? Some things are in our nature, some things we have learned. I learned from my counted years what pain is when I hold some things or person in my life. It shows I want security in life and my relationship. I gently bring myself back into the present moment and say, “It’s completely alright. That was the past, and now I must focus on my happiness. Now I am enjoying Insecurity in my Life. I know my relationship doesn’t work out, but I know my life will go on and live as it flows. I may know tomorrow is beautiful because tomorrow is total freedom. Nobody knows what is going to happen, whether we will be breathing, whether we will be alive at all. Nobody knows. Thus, there is beauty because everything is in disorder, a challenge, and everything exists as a possibility. Furthermore, Death is secure, completely secure. The moment we choose security, unknowingly, we have chosen Death. If we want beautiful gaps in life, we have to start loving Insecurity. And then a miracle happens. If we know Insecurity contains Love, Happiness, Truth, Divinity, and Beauty, where is the Insecurity?
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